Well, word came that mom was sent to the hospital for shortness of breath. Then as I was getting ready, word came again that she is in the ICU. I got the earliest flight back and went directly to the hospital. She recognized me and was communicative with everyone there. But that was the best day since I got here. She never took food so they put in the feednig tube. She was breathing hard and constipated. And she has been sleeping during the day when I am here. The mask they put on her to inflate the lung keeps her up so she couldn’t get good sleep at night. Even during the day, there are constant interruptions with vital sign checking, weighing, anima, asthma like breathing medicine… on and on and on.
The only thing she is saying to me now is that she wants to go home. go home. go home. Sometimes, she would call for her mom, too. It’s a hard process to be born, and it’s also a hard one in the end. The body is shutting down slowly and all the advanced medicine can only try to help whatever minimal function there is left to keep alive. And all these measures just increase the discomfort of the elderly. There is no easy way and the onlookers feel helpless.
Dying is a very hard process for everyone involved.