Monthly Archives: June 2011

For some reason, work has been a challenge lately. Not only the official work with Peter but side jobs with the studio too. Actually, Peter has calmed down this week. He sounded more reasonable and less aggressive or demanding. I told him I have lost sleep over his project, he told me not to. If we have to live with the current setting while trying to find a better solution, that’s ok. That gave me a bit more breathing room. I’m still frantically trying to locate a ip camera viewer that would provide true full screen and nothing else viewing of the camera. Not too much luck yet. Most of them are for controlling and recording or motion detection. Not just for viewing. Very frustrating.

Studio just hired a new “Marketing Director”. Nice title. I saw her once a few weeks ago and already could tell she has a personality that I may not like to work with. And sure enough, she emailed yesterday a word document and asked me to put on the homepage. I tried to be polite and suggested that word is not a good format to put stuff on the web. Rod made a pdf file out of it. I’m still stuck with just a pdf file. The easiest way is to put a linnk to it but I know it’s not what she asked for. If we want to put a pdf file on Joomla, there is a plug-in we have to install. I kind of suggested that to Rod, he acknowledged that indeed he will need to install the plug in if we want to embed the pdf on the homepage. But he suggested putting a link to the file also. I thanked him and did it. The incoming Director sent back and email informing both of us that she is “very, very versed” in Joomla. And showed a link to a site she said she made with Joomla. I am irritated that she didn’t pick up the subtlties in the email and the polite push and pull. She stepped right in and announced that she is an expert. I emailed the owners and suggested that I send her the log ins so she can go right ahead and implement what she wants. Haven’t heard back from them yet. I would be happy to turn it over to her so I don’t have to deal with her. I am less and less tolerant of arrogant people who shows no respect and basic courtesy to others.

It would be really nice not having to answer to anyone else but myself. Work on my site and photos and do or choose not to do anything I want. Make my own decisions, work hard on the problems with no time limit and not have to waste my energy on something others deem important that means nothing to me. I really don’t work well with demanding people. I am not one of them and have a hard time dealing with them.

I went swimming after the short work today. Did 5 laps of free and 5 laps of breast. One to work my arms and one to work my legs. Will build it up with time. I get out of breath after the first 5 and need a bit rest between laps right now. I know I will get better and able to do more laps. Maybe for now, the goal is 10 for each. It takes about a minute a lap. Not that great but I don’t mind. I’m not training for competition any more, just want to get better fit.

Stretched tonight after dinner and rest. Stood at the top of the stairs and worked on my ankles like Tony said I need to. And tried to stretch my legs. It does feel good afterwards although it’s a bit uncomfortable during. I need to keep on doing it to get my body more flexible. Not just for dancing, but for my general health, too.

Still watching ballet movies. Fascinated. Their beautiful movement, their unbelievable flexibility, their exhaustion, their sweat. There is a silent determination on their face through it all. A will. A strong one. That’s what it takes to achieve. Human determination.

And yet a 40 year ballerina who’s retiring asked if that is life after all the grandiose moments on the stage, is it life?

OOOOh the frustratinos. Desparately trying to get the picture showing full screen with no border with the $300 software we bought for the camera. It is not there! It is in the free software that came with the bb-hcm735. I can change the color of the border to anything. So I changed it to black and hid it. But the expensive software we bought in order to get the high resolution doesn’t have the option. How come!

I have called their support line lots of times. They are of no help at all. They are courteous but they don’t have the knowledge or the ability to even put you in touch with the developers. One of them told me there is no way to change the border color on the free software, I found it by myself. One of them told me to go to this site to download the software in order to see the high resolution. Nope. It doesn’t give you high resolution. The next person told me to buy the $300 software, but not from them, I should go to where ever I bought the camera from. Okaaaaay.

Now the last person told me to go to their support page and submit an email for the border problem in the expensive software. They can’t contact the developer for me, they can’t because they are in different divisions. Really! what is a support team if they cannot get in touch of the development team. The customer has to go to the website and submit a separate email request? okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

I really hate to disappoint my boss. And peter is so picky abuot how the picture is shown on the screen. He wants the picture to fill the whole screen and nothing else. Not a thing. And I can’t do it. Blue Iris has a border and the name of the camera showing. My web script that uses their on camera cgi can’t display live motion because it only refreshes every 3 seconds. Their single camera view from the control software doesn’t fill the screen and leaves a grey border at the top with a camera icon and a resize icon. oooooooooh the frustration.

Watched a movie about a young ballerina working her way to be a professional dancer. The hard work she put in, the sweat, the inhuman way of stretching her/their bodies, all inspired me. An effortless looking movement is the result of hours and days of hard work doing the same thing over and over and over again.

I got inspired to put in the effort to dance my best, to go exercise, to learn anything. You have to put in the time and effort and hard work if you want to be good at anything. Dancing, photographing, using photoshop. Everything.

There are hundreds of hours of quiet work behind an hour of performance.

Connie called and invited us over for an impromptu dinner. We brought some lettuce and a bottle of wine and I had a good night visiting with her and her neighbor Patty. Tim was a bit under the weather and he and Leo watched movies all night while us girls chatted and laughed and cooked and drank the night away. The poor men, and lucky us.

Went swimming, and it felt good. Of all the work out, I really like the swimming the best. When you are done, you feel clean and not sweaty. Going to connie’s for grilled chicken dinner. A good Sunday.

After Leo left for his hike, I was planning to go swimming at the rec center. But as I was getting ready, an old star seeing phenon appeared out of nowhere. When I was young, I would get this when I was hungry or tired. But I had a bit of gnocchi leftover from Bravo yesterday and I shouldn’t be low on sugar. But it happened and I had to wait it out. I watched the latest episode of Mostly Photo and that was rewarding in its own way. Now it’s after 1pm and my day just started so to speak. I can still go swimming and bring my camera too. BTW, I just ordered the 14-24mm wide angle lens, one of the must-haves in the bag of lens. One down and not too many to go actually. Now if I can put in more shooting time to improve my photography skills, that would be the perfect thing to do. I will. I am hoping to take trips and take as many pictures as I can in the future. I should be very well set in terms of lenses by then. When I retire, I would be able to go on seconds notice.

Yesterday, I was lamented over leaving for the Michigan Classic in Detroit. But I didn’t go. I went to Connie’s garage sale and had dinner with Sandy and Daniel. I had a good day, but I still didn’t take any pictures. I did have an ah-ha moment. I realize the importance of getting up and go do the things I want to do instead of taking the coward route and not do anything. I would be much happier if I just do it. I will have to remind myself to ‘do’ instead of regret for doing nothing the next day.

Do not know what has got into me today. I have been very restless. Frustrated but can’t put my finger on what. Called Tim and cancelled my lesson. Want to get out but have no destination. For a few days now, I wanted to go out with my camera to shoot pictures by myself. Actually, today would be ideal and yet I don’t want to do it. I thought about driving to Detroit for the Michigan classic and do some Jack and Jill. At one point, I really thought about packing and going but Leo has no idea and he was on the golf course. Stir crazy. And as the day comes to the end, I am getting frustrated and depressed.

I think I need some alone time and the fact that I have not been able to do it is driving me a bit crazy. Go out and shoot picture or get on the road and drive for a few hours appeal to me. Work has not been an uplifting place lately, dancing has not given me the same satisfaction or motivation either, picture taking is an on going process of learning but not rewarding.

Lots of shoulds in my mind but nothing is getting done. Very frustrated.

Lately, work has got a bit stressful. Peter is a perfectionist in his own way and very demanding too. He’s a great friend and will come to your help whenever you ask. But working for him is a different story. I knew that side of him before I came to work for him. The first year however was fine, he gave me a big project and I worked on it one day a week until I finished it. This year, he has become more demanding and wouldn’t take no for an answer for anything he asks for. I kind of understand his reasoning and how he wants things to be just perfect in the area that he deems important. But my personality is the opposite. I don’t like to fuss about the details, I don’t care whether a picture screen has a red border or not. I don’t mind seeing the web browser’s status bar or top frame when it goes to full screen mode. I tried to disable them but the status bar will not go away. The web cam picture will sometimes fill the frame, sometimes not. And it just has to leave some space on the right yesterday when Peter came up to look at it. He went into a frustrating tone of voice and started being annoyed and unkind.

I know this is only temporary and I’m only working part time, 8 hours a week for him. And I can leave in a year and never look back. I just have to be patient with him and put up with his semi-abusive attitude. This web cam project is not something I like to do or feel comfortable handling in the way he demands. It almost sounds like I need to write my own code to do exactly what he wants. I am not a programmer for the camera or the browser. An area I never got into. So I always feel inadequate and frustrating when I ran into the limitations of the software or the browser.

I understand exactly what Trey was saying when he told us in the webinar that he would never go on sponsored photo shoots or be hired as a photographer. He wants to pay for his own tirps and make his own decisions on what to shoot and how to edit it. Be your own boss doing what you love to do. That is the ultimate freedom and happiness.