Author Archives: Christine

   

Amazing clouds on the afternoon walk with Benny

Often when I walk Benny, I see interesting clouds.  This is one of those times.

I’m reading this book.  And finally it is grabbing my attention.  Just as she struggled to learn how to meditate, I struggled the same to stay with a book.

**  I just found out how difficult it is to copy some text from a SCRIBD book even if you are a paid subscriber **

Just wanted to save some typing while reflecting on this subject.  But it is not to be..

“I knew that to eliminate the ‘I want’ frame of reference I would have to become more relaxed — to be a participant in the middle-way, a way that recommends no over-indulgence nor extreme ascetism.”

This resonates with me in my thinking about reading.  I found that my mind often wanders when I read.  Maybe it’s the fact that I read on my ipad or like now I am reading on my big 27″ apple monitor.  The ease of reaching for the keyboard and do some searching in the browser does not help me when I am ready.  Maybe that’s why Scribd has a full screen mode so you can focus better.  Nevertheless, my mind wanders like hers when she was meditating.  Yes, I can gently bring my mind back to the text in front of me, but it is equally frustrating for me as it was for her.  And to be honest, this applies to most things we need to focus at hand.  I often put audible on and listen to a book while I cook or clean (rare occasion), it helps me finish the physical tasks while engaging my mind.  Even then, my mind can wander away from the narrator and go into its own stories.  Maybe a few minutes later, I will catch myself and pay attention to the book again.

So the mind wanders often and all the time without our awareness.  If we do pay attention to its wandering, we probably will get frustrated often.  This is the struggle between ‘over-indulgence’ and ‘extreme ascetism’.  The word compromise comes to mind, which means the same as ‘middle-way’ in her book.  Also, mindfulness is to be able to observe the mind wandering and detach from it instead of identify with it.  The peace and calmness comes from that observing entity which understands that the mind likes to bounce around but it does not need to.

So be kind to yourself.  Do not get flustered by the quickness and aimlessness of the mind.  It may be the nature of the mind.  It may be the animal instinct that has existed in us for generations.  Just know that I am not the mind, or the thoughts, or the dreams, I am separate from them.  Observe them and let them go.

 

Yesterday, we went to Whole Foods to get some fruits and vegetables for me to do a few days of raw food/vegetables diet.  I have been eating poorly lately, too much meat and not enough vegetables.  Watched some raw food lifestyle youtube videos and got motivated to go back to it for a few days.  Really want to lose a few pounds that have been accumulated around the tummy.  At the check out, saw Elim called and sent a text to wish me happy birthday.  Surprised to remember that it was my ‘real’ birthday and I totally forgot about it.  She didn’t.  This made me both pleasantly surprised and happy.  Didn’t even get upset for me forgetting about it or even Leo.

We went to Bahama Breeze for lunch and celebrated the birthday there.  The mood was dampened a bit by their really, really slow service.  We waited 10 minutes and nobody showed up.  I went to the receptionist and asked who our waiter is and that started the ball rolling.  But then it took forever for the drinks to come.  The waitress asked the manager to come over, she said she had no explanation for the delay and apologized.  I asked for some water and that was the extent of their concern.  So 30 minutes after we sat down, we finally got our drinks.  The margarita flight was ok, looks pretty but the taste was ok.  The Ahi Tuna appetizer was really good, and it came with lots of greens.  The seafood paella was ok, nothing special either.  And the whole service was spotty and slow.  Even after the waitress dropped off the take home box, we had to wait a long while and ask for the check.  Maybe it’s just a one time deal, but the experience sucked.

When we got home, I took Benny out for a pee, and saw a box of flowers sitting by the door.  I knew immediately that it was from Elim.  She sent me flowers from “Pro Flowers” to the office when I was working for 2 consecutive days when she knew I was having a hard time at work.  She is a sweet daughter.  This time it’s from both her and Ryan.  Their note was sweet and made me happy.  And they called later again too.

It turned out to be a nice surprised birthday.  I am still bathing in warmth today.  And the number 60 seems to be significant.  Feels like I should have done something special about it.  Maybe I will.  From 9/24 to 11/5 is my birthday ‘period’.  I have plenty of time to reflect and do something about it.  Wow, 60.

Still trying to find a workflow to insert pictures into the post from lightroom.  Drag and drop works on the Add New Post page, but it isn’t set as the featured image.  There isn’t an option in the image upload window to set it.  Have to manually set it from the post.